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Embracing Becoming Dauntless

Updated: Apr 14

This follows on from my previous post on the Divergent factions. If you are not aware of Divergent, I include the first paragraph from the initial post here;

Inspired by Divergent (the book series by Veronica Roth) and by one character’s admission that he wanted to be the personification of all five factions within this fictional world, I felt this was a great blueprint for life. How could we develop all these facets of ourselves? Even if you haven’t read the book, this is still a great guide to seeking a well-rounded life. I suggest reading the blurb prior to reading this post, which is based around these five factions.

After sharing this post I was contacted by others inspired by the Dauntless faction, but not feeling like it was where they would naturally lean towards. They felt insurmountable difficulty facing their fears. It's something I hear a lot, particularly when sharing certain experiences I have had in my life. Often when I mention solo travel, living in another country, job hopping, and living alone. Also more personally when I share the times I have stood my ground against an abuser, started a new community business, or taken on deputy chair role for a charity with zero experience. I often hear the same response "I would be too scared to do that". This makes me sad that we aren't living our lives to the full. Including myself. My fears list is never ending and although I align with Dauntless, I still have far more than four fears.

How do I overcome the fears I have had?

With questions like these, there is never one sole answer. I can list;

  • My upbringing and my Mother being consistent with making sure I stand on my own two feet.

  • Facing death and surviving.

  • My bigger fear of dying with regrets.

  • The regrets I do have that changed the course of my life.

  • The intense pull of my dreams.

  • The persistent inner knowing that life is meant to be more than we often think it is.

  • Understanding that fear can be overcome with techniques such as repeated and increased exposure, EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique), adjusting our self talk.

  • The rewards that come when a fear is faced and walked through.

How can you overcome your fears?

As with all spiritual adventures, I encourage you to look within and find your own personal motivation. Start with asking yourself what kind of things you want to do. Make a list and dream big. They may stay as dreams but for now, explore the depths of your mind. I believe far more is possible than we allow ourselves to believe. Don't think about the 'how'. The Universe moves when you move. Just fill your paper with everything. Surround it with how you would want to feel, what you would see, what values you have that these dreams align to.

There may be a fear to overcome that isn't a dream, or something you even want to do. Like the fear of a certain eight legged creature. It would be far easier if they just didn't exist perhaps? However since they do then you might include 'feeling comfortable around arachnids', as your wish.

On a separate document or piece of paper, write down everything that holds you back from living your life as a result of these fears, and be honest. What do you stand to lose? The crux will be the price of living your life fully and potentially building up regrets as you go through your life.

On a separate document or piece of paper, explore what you have to gain. Really feel the elation of facing these fears, and how good it will be to see yourself doing things that you previously couldn't imagine.

The next action is to work out what first step you need to take towards facing these fears. You don't have to think about it all. Just one step. One of my fears was learning to drive. So I just booked one lesson. Once I saw that a car wasn't that scary, and my instructor could make sure I didn't kill anyone, I felt okay to book more lessons. This is still dauntless, with added wisdom. Another fear I have is of heights. So I booked a session at Go Ape. I made it up to the zip line before I couldn't continue. But I know that if I keep going, one day I'll be echoing my screams through the forest as I zoom down that line.

Request assistance

Our spiritual helpers are here for adventures just like these. Seek guidance from these realms as well as our family and friends who cheerlead you;

  • Ask your heart to open yourself up to the right people to help you along.

  • Ask the Universe for support to guide you to the first and next steps.

  • Use Shamanism to meet an animal guide to strengthen you.

  • Make a list of the people in your life who champion you living your life to the full.

  • Embrace your inner Phoenix to set fire to the old, scared you.

  • Create something to symbolise the new dauntless you.

Facing my fears

I face my fears with wisdom and motivation to not carry regret. I allow the Universe to light the way and trust the responses I get when I specifically ask for them to be shown to me.

Australia was a place I had zero desire of ever visiting. I had no idea about their working visa programme, no wish to live in a sunny place or leave the UK for anything more than a holiday. One day an old friend of mine was visiting who had recently emigrated to Australia. She told me how wonderful life was there and I was having none of it. I ended the conversation saying to her; "If the Universe wants me to go to Australia, it will give me a clear cut sign". A statement which effectively cut all chatter dead for a few minutes.

There was a knock on the door, and the new arrival to the party had a bottle of wine. They walked into the garden and plonked the bottle in front of me. My eyes fell to the label and straight to the words 'Product of Australia'. Damn.

Did I let a bottle of wine dictate my future, hell yes! It was the sign from the Universe that I had specifically asked for. You could say the arrival of my friend that day was also a sign, but I was not willing to listen. I went to Australia, made incredible memories and it was one the best things I have ever done. Had I not asked the Universe, and not taken that sign seriously, none of it would have ever happened.

Because of that one trip, I have become travel obsessed. I am terrified on a level every time I go somewhere new and old. But I know in my heart that travel is the thing that makes me most alive. So I will keep doing it.

One of the key pieces of advice I can give you is to not listen to your fears drawing you a picture that isn't real. Let your own experience draw that for you. Your fears are just a voice, You don't have to listen. How much do you truly want to be Dauntless?

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